I hear stories all the time about people that feel trapped in their situations. Marriages, relationships, creative situations, jobs, debt. You name it, people are stuck or feel stuck.
I have felt stuck many times in my life. Even though my life seems great to other people who observe it, I also feel stuck many times. It doesn’t matter who you are or what you do, you are always going to find yourself stuck in a situation.
For example, currently I feel that my career is deserved of more widespread exposure because the quality of work that I produce warrants that. It is not up to the outside world to provide that to me though. It is up to me to provide that to myself and allow the world to bend to that demand. I must sell that concept or let people know that it exists, so that they may help me achieve that result. It is not going to happen on it’s own though. When things don’t happen on their own, we feel stuck.
This is the situation that most people find themselves stuck in. They think things are just going to happen. Everything needs a catalyst. Nothing happens by itself. I talk about this in the myth of viral video. The fact that “viral video” or things just randomly happening is a myth. Everything needs a catalyst. So, if you are stuck in a situation, you need a catalyst to make that situation change. You need to become that catalyst. You become that catalyst by creating a plan and making a conscious decision to make a change. You must push yourself to make that change. Muscles don’t get bigger unless you put stress on them. Little things don’t become big things unless you make them big. Buildings don’t get built without detailed plans and a lot of effort. You already know this, but your fear is stopping you from making a change.
We all have fear, it is a fundamental human emotion. Some fear is totally warranted. If you live in a warzone, you have every right to fear making a change. You making a change could put your life in danger. But compliance can also put your life in danger. Any number of countries operated by dictators are perfect examples of this. People constantly live in fear of what the king is going to do and because of that nobody takes action. It is okay to live your life this way, but I assure you, you are not living. And if you live in America or any 1st world nation and you live in fear of making a change, that is not a valid excuse for your inaction.
One of the biggest tragedies of the 1st world is that people that will not face any serious dire threat to their physical existence stay trapped because they fear making a change. This is the stupidest thing on the planet. It is a result of our pampered culture where everyone gets a trophy. No they don’t and they shouldn’t. This is why the shitty students in school like Elon Musk and myself run shit. It’s because we are masters at taking action and taking matters into our own hands.
I had roomates before that smoked weed and slept all day long watching television, youtube and consuming social media until they had to work. They would look to me for opportunities because they were too lazy to get out there and create them for themselves. “I’m going to email you my resume”. Statements like that are laughable. Why would I share your resume with another high value motherfucker like myself when you’re smoking weed all day? If it was a performance enhancing drug for people they would be out there handing their resumes to people besides me while they were on it. I have nothing against weed and I do smoke it, but I only do it to the extent that it serves me a benefit. Once any substance starts to detract from my mission, I cease consuming it or cut back on it.
You need to be creating opportunities and not taking them. People who create opportunities become the bosses. People who take opportunities become the slaves. If you are looking to me for the solution, the solution I provide you with is going to benefit me first and you second. While I am exceptionally good at creating mutually beneficial agreements, if I am writing you a check, you are ultimately working for me and whatever agenda I decide to push.
This post could go on and on. There are so many examples of situations I could provide. I have known many people stuck in marriages with partners that don’t want to evolve when they do. Partners that are abusive, etc. But people still don’t leave. They fear all of these non existent and proverbial situations that might occur if they leave - primarily the fact that they won’t be able to support themselves financially if they did. This is also a result of our entitlement culture. People stay stuck because they have so many financial obligations that have little to do with their essential needs. Car payments, house payments, expensive rent, dinners, handbags and shoes. None of these things are income producing assets.
If your husband abuses you and you have kids together, that is not a reason to stay together. I am not a family counselor or expert, but would you rather your kids be in an abusive situation with you and your spouse or in a safe one with just you? These are the questions you need to be asking yourself. There are all sorts of non-profit organizations out there dealing with abusive relationships and how to get out of them. You need to start exploring them to find solutions. If you are provided with a list of solutions to your current problems and you fail to act on any of them, it’s going to be difficult or impossible to make changes absent effort.
I may elaborate on this in a podcast, but for now that is the moral of the story. You need to look at untrapping yourself by taking action.
Action creates inertia and momentum and these things change things.